Vancouver Courier
for December 27, 1998

Santa’s Igloo, North Pole – Boxing Day.

Ho! Ho! Ho! And all that jazz … this is Santa to tell you who was naughty and who was nice which list, thanks to the fact that Ms. Claus is computer literate, I can download and pass on to you immediately.

Santa’s nice guy of the year is clearly Bruce Claridge, the former Lions football great, who, dying of cancer, attended and by all accounts exulted in his own wake. As a friend said, Bruce wanted to hear all the bs before he went. However great an athlete Bruce was his inspiration as a dying man stands him head and shoulders above all other mortals this year.

The naughty boy of the year goes to Glen Clark whose stocking was overflowing in black coal this year. It was a close race between him and Jean Chretien as both spent most of the year exercising raw, unrestrained power without caring a fiddler’s fart for the public’s wishes. Mr Clark has personalized his party as no one else has done since the days of his hero W.A.C. Bennett but whereas W.A.C. always put his actions to the test holding elections every three years, it appears that Clark will run out the string. His refusal to permit the public to have its proper role in dealing with the Nisga’a settlement is a good example of the premier’s "my way or the highway" approach. Very naughty.

A nice lad was Craig Jones, the APEC demonstrator who was thrown to the ground and manhandled by three RCMP for having the temerity to hold up signs saying "democracy" and "free speech." Mr Jones’ activity was at considerable risk since he was a law student and placed his career at stake. While it’s up to the individual as to whether he or she has rings jammed through their bodies in awkward places, Mr Jones’ clean cut articulateness made it very difficult for citizens to put the APEC incident down to latter day hippies.

A very naughty little boy was Jean Chretien who denied his minions a free vote on the "hepatitis ‘C’" matter and refused to take his huge share of the responsibility for the gross overreaction of the police to the APEC protesters. Mr Chretien is not only an autocrat, he acts like one, trampling quickly upon any who deign to argue with him. Not only was he naughty, he was grossly insensitive, as his endless stream of "witticisms" about pepper spray proved.

A nice little boy was Attorney-General Ujjal Dosanjh who demonstrated how an attorney-general ought to carry himself. He certainly was not without controversial and, in my view incorrect decisions but the fact that he looked and acted as an attorney-general ought to gives him high marks. If he had announced what I predict he will announce in the New Year, a Royal Commission into the Justice system, he would have headed the "niceness

A naughty little boy was Dan Miller whose continued arrogance has reached levels not seen in government since Louis XIV. Not only did he try to affect the outcome of a lawsuit his department was involved in, by having his lawyer call the judge, his every utterance reminded one of Bob Williams whom he seems intent on imitating. He is so arrogant that when he speaks now the media largely ignore him because his haughtiness is so predictable – as, for example, when he threatened to remove the ferry terminal from Nanaimo if the city council didn’t do as he told them.

A nice chappie was Fred Gingell, the Liberal frontbencher in Victoria who took his cancer in stride, asked for no sympathy and continued his job with competence and good humour. Fred is living proof that unless you have a killer instinct about as strong as Bill Clinton’s libido, you will be admired but not seen as a leader.

Another nice lad – though by no means all year long – was Ken Georgetti who started the defence fund for the APEC demonstrators thus accomplishing the difficult if not impossible task of making then Solicitor-General Andy Scott look even stupider. Which brings up another naughty boy. Andy Scott was not bad because he spoke to his seat mate on an airplane about government matters but because he lied about it so long. The coal in his stocking came early this year.

Another "nice" boy was Dr John Blatherwick who continues to give us common sense and humour as he guides us through public health issues.

Gordon Wilson for his hypocrisy in supporting the Charlottetown referendum while rejecting one for Nisga’a gets into the "naughty" niche and ,the way he is going, will soon be anonymous and off the list entirely.

And, finally, the comeback of the year award goes to Fisheries Minister Anderson who, by showing a bit of humanness and a touch of humility proves that even the naughtiest of children can get back on Santa’s list.